here today

 

things lucy eats.

deer poo
my parents house borders a park. deer wander up into their yard. Lu treats it like a buffet.

mud
the park near my old apartment had the yummiest mud. I think it was the fertilizer. All the dogs ate it.

grass
when she's anxious. which is most of the time.

seven cubes of butter -wrappers included
each time it happens, I look around for the butter, puzzled. I get another cube out, then notice Lu licking her chops, giving a small burp of joy, and looking around for more butter.

a baseball glove
this was when she was a puppy and I thought it was cute to see her carry around my glove. then she ate it.

two thousand tennis balls
yep.

that toy that the guy at the pet store claimed was indestructible
it wasn't.

1 pillow
scattered feathers are actually kind of pretty. then you have to clean them up.

three cardboard boxes
Lucy doesn't like to move.

Stephan's letters from the IRS
he mailed them to me.
I fed them to Lu.
I took pictures and sent them back.
it was performance art.

part of a dead bird
icky.

one enchilada from a dinner party guest’s plate
this catagory should really be bigger but I don't like to admit that my dog is not a good party guest. people think she's sidling up to them to show them some love but really she's angling for chow.
hold your plate too low and the food is gone.

toilet paper
Lucy stays with my parents when we go on trips. she is fascinated by their toilet paper. probably because we buy the recycled stuff that's no fun and my parents' toilet paper is soft and fluffy and spreading it around the house is deliriously good times.

half of a plant
I never liked that plant.

6 oz. Pepper Jack cheese, 10 oz. brie, 12 oz. very expensive Parmesan
cheese is not good for her tummy. cheese means trouble in the middle of the night. Lucy loves cheese.

the arms and legs of a doll
actually first she ate the face.
which was disturbing.

a million chew sticks
they keep her busy for like a minute. I buy them by the truckload.

eighteen dog beds
now we just buy blankets at the thrift stores. lucy likes to rip them apart while tossing her head at us. it's funny and scary. both.

a loaf of banana bread wrapped in tin foil.
yes, she also ate the tin foil.

Science Diet dog food for Sensitive Stomachs
sensitive stomach? ha.

Posted by: 120pages at 08:07 | link | comments (3) |