here today

 

truth be told

birthday tradition three years running: N & the professor and I drink, laugh, bum cigarettes from the chef, huddle outside to smoke don't care that we're getting older which of us will have babies first, or last or never, we go out on into the world as a threesome the professor always drives even on her birthday, husbands make us crazy, and then there's the career.  Winter tradition all of our birthdays are in the winter scorpio, capricorn, aquarius we three.

I am odd man out in this group, never mind that too much sit back and watch them agree on most everything. 

Never do I mind it too much even last year which was a seminal year if such a thing exists - turned 35 and normally I don't care about numbers - numbers mean nothing but last year found me in a crisis of paths and love and I put on a jacket and tie ben's pale blue tie matches my eyes you know I looked quite sassy for the celebration my celebration but the night fizzled into N telling me I'm cold and perhaps manly how could a woman feel that way about sex like it's just an event something fun there for the taking.  how could a woman not want babies married to Ben and not want his babies.  how could a woman orgasm just thinking about ben's touch on my arm or some days anyone's touch on my arm not that I want that but it is a physiological fact of life. 

How can you be you and not us?  was it the tie I wonder or my relationship with the truth me and truth Strutting out there.  Me and th truth odering my drink back then it was still tequila and coke bit of lime squeezed in.  

this year I might skip that scene go out to PIX with ben drink Pernod lap up the Parisian vibe.  start a new tradition. 

or maybe I'll dress up go out with the girls like always and there I will be again surprised to find myself one next to two.  deliciously odd like the blue cheese truffles at Pix that no one else liked they melt like butter such a shocking combination I can't get enough. 

 yes I guess I never do mind it too much.  truth be told.

 

 

Posted by: 120pages at 09:49 | link | comments (6) |