here today

 

dichotomy

monday night I came home to a letter from my school denying my petition to work with my old therapist. damn them. monday night I read the letter while stepping down to the back door to let Lu out to romp while I changed into my running gear. monday night while holding the letter from my school the letter denying my petition i stepped the wrong way, flew up and then fell. on concrete.



and here is where it turns into a story of good news bad news.



monday night I fell on the stairs and landed so hard on my back that I couldn't breathe couldn't walk couldn't talk couldn't get up. I landed so hard that Lu backed away from me barking and scared. I landed so hard I thought I had broken a rib maybe punctured my lung maybe paralyzed for life.



the good news is none of that happened.



the bad news is that I can't breathe without pain and I fly down to CA for the weekend tomorrow and I'm off the meds so I can toughen up for the journey. the bad news is I feel very human and fragile. the bad news is there is no way to avoid falling in life. I can mostly avoid guns, warfare, psychopaths, drunk drivers, my mom on a mean day but I can't avoid stairs.



the good news is nothing broke, fractured, punctured. An inch either way said the nice man in the ER - an inch either way and I wouldn't be writing this post. the good news is I have health insurance and Ben who was late for his rehearsal holding my hand, calling my parents, filling out forms.



the bad news is I can't see into the future or I wouldn't have taken that last step.
the good news is I'm better already here at work reading motime. hooray.


talk soon,

me.

Posted by: 120pages at 11:52 | link | comments (4) |